Change (kinda emotional)

Haven't posted a blog entry in nearly a month, and I apologize for that!

For you readers who get entertained by my life and my rants, I thank you for that hehe.

Had a talk with an old friend recently, about change.

We all have changed, be it from a couple of weeks ago to a few years back.

Change is imminent, change is crucial.
Change is different.

I look back to when I was still in Secondary School.

Back to when I was in Primary School. 

I was so different back then.

In primary school, I was a quiet, meek little girl.

People who know me now think that's not possible.

I opened up to my friends only in primary 4, when I was 10.

Prior to that, I didn't have many friends.

I know, right. *GASP*

One concept that I could never grasp is the 'best friend'.

Everyone had one. But I could never find one.

Up til now, I have a colossal amount of close friends, good friends, best friends even.

But still not one who I can spill everything, and I mean EVERYTHING out to.

They come and go. Or I get backstabbed. :(

However, to my current clique(s) of friends, 

Secondary, poly and even primary.

I thank God for having brought you in my life. You guys are awesome and I appreciate every single one of you.

I hope you guys know that! :)

Listing all of you is pointless. You guys don't need ego boosts. :P

This rather emotionally turbulent post was brought about by me watching a Korean film.

I should never watch Korean film/dramas cos they make me cry every single bloody time.

Anyhoo, the film I watched was "Wonderful Radio"

I heard about it from the Korean variety show called Running Man, which is pretty awesome.

The show is really emotional and touching, and it talks about change.

How the female lead has matured emotionally through the years.

I think if you wanna watch it you gotta be prepared to cry, haha.

Which leads me to this very lengthy blog post.

"How much have I changed from 5 years ago?"

And I realized that most of these things were negative.

Which is no good at all, duh.

Personally, I grew more negative. Negative in my thoughts, in my actions.

I would always go all out for my friends, my family, in whatever I did.

Put in 100%, no more, no less.

But after being laughed at/being shot down/people always having gloomy thoughts.

I became negative. 

I no longer hope for the best in any situation. I always mentally prepare myself for the worst.

I go into each exam hall knowing that failure is always imminent. 

And with each passing day I just grow sadder.

Everyone is getting busier. 

What I miss the most about secondary school are my girl guides. 

I know that sounds corny and whatnot and we don't even keep in contact much anymore.

But the one thing the guides represented was positivity.

We practically glowed with it.

Everytime one of us was feeling down, we would repeat the guide law.

Law #7, I still recall.

"A guide must have courage and be cheerful in all difficulties"

I may no longer be a Guide (too fat and old to be one haha), but I hope to pass this saying onto you, my friends and readers.

Let's change "A guide" to "One" so that dudes can say it freely hehe

"One must always have courage and be cheerful in all difficulties."

After being sad and emotional AND PROCRASTINATING FROM DOING MY WORK.

I shall end off this post with this funny cartoon to cheer you up from reading sad stuff haha.

Kayleen